Thursday, 31 July 2008
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I'm falling again..
After me and Ryan's break up I didn't think it would be possible for me to have these feelings for another guy, but this just feels right. His name is Justin. We've been together for 3 weeks now, but I feel like I've known him forever. He picked up the broken pieces of my heart and is slowly putting it back together. He's helped me a lot and he really cares about me. But I have to admit, I'm scared out of my mind..I'm so afraid of getting my heart broken again because I fear that I couldn't handle it. He has the same feelings I do, he ended up heartbroken in his last relationship too. So in a way we kinda saved each other.. He says he's never felt this way with another girl before..he says he's falling in love with me. And I know I'm falling too. I trust him, even though I never thought I could trust again. He makes me happy, I can now smile and laugh with ease. I don't cry myself to sleep anymore. He's completely turned my life around. I love everything about him..theirs just one thing that has really been bothering me..he's pushy when it comes to sexual stuff. Like he's not pressuring me to have sex anytime real soon, but he's wanting to do some pretty intense stuff, and we havn't been together that long. I think were moving to fast, but he doesn't think so. Maybe I'm just being stupid, I mean, I do want to do that stuff with him..I've just always been insecure about myself. And he's really experienced, I'm not. But I guess I just need to overlook that and go along with it, because everything else is perfect about him. I don't want to screw everything up just because I'm insecure..
I'm just scared..I really don't want to get hurt again, but I think I'm ready to trust him with my heart.
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Comments (3)
Love is a fickle and funny thing but it shouldn't scare you. If you have any doubts, any discomforts, you should talk to him about them. If he really is falling for you the way you are for him, then he should understand that you want to slow down on the physical aspect of the relationship. He should want to make you feel comfortable. If at any point you feel like you need to stop and take a look at all the details of your relationship, he should be willing to stop with you. If not then you have some thinking on your own to do. Don't get me wrong, Steve and I humped like rabbits after a week of dating but we were both comfortable and both wanted it and knew what we wanted out of the relationship. But not every relationship is the same so try to find out what is most important to you and stand firmly behind it. If this relationship doesn't work out, look at it like this, you've lived without him before, you can do it again. Heartache only makes us stronger and wiser.
@itiscomplicated - Thanks, I'm definitely going to talk to him. I think I will definitely be more comfortable after we hang out a couple more times..since we've been together we've actually only hung out 3 times, and I only met him like a day before we started dating. But I think things will get easier after were together a little longer. Thanks for the advice.
If you're not ready for it, you're not ready for it. You could be 40 years old and still not be ready for it, honestly! But trust me on this--a good boyfriend would NOT make you feel stupid for wanting to take things slow. You haven't even been dating that long, either, you mentioned. I broke up with my first boyfriend because I told him I wanted to take things slow and he took it as rejection. But you know what? That's life. I needed someone who would be patient and understanding, and that's the type of person any other gal needs, too. So talk to him about it and stand firm behind your values. Don't let ANYONE put you down for what you believe in. Besides, you will be so proud of yourself when you stick to your guns because you won't have any regrets.